If It Takes All Summer An entry for the Fall 2003 Moments of Rapture Contest by Granate, 2003 - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - I have but one goal for the summer: kiss Heero Yuy. Seems like such a simple thing, doesn't it? But this is Heero, and things are always a little different with him. Kissing Heero has not always been one of my goals, I'll have you know. I suppose my very first goal was to stop him from shooting Relena. Took only minutes with a couple well-aimed shots. My next goal would probably have been to get him to stop glaring icicles at me with those eyes of his and talk to me. That one took almost the entire war. After the war, it was a goal to just keep up with the guy. I was on L2 most of 196 and he sort of wandered around. No one really knows what he did. I am proud to report that I got the most letters from him during that time out of anyone I know. Sure, it wasn't a freaking teddy bear, but that's not my thing anyway. Christmas brought about the annual Gundam Pilot Reunion Party and after the fun was over, I went back to L2 and the salvage business and Heero stayed with Relena. Not even I know the details of what exactly went on during that time, but suffice to say, it didn't last long. So, where does a poor boy with only four friends in the entire Earth Sphere turn? One friend was rich and busy; one friend lived with a bunch of carnies and shared a trailer with a knife thrower; another traded in his Gundam for a uniform and badge; and the final friend ran his own small business and lived in his own small house with an empty bedroom. Bingo. I've been able to resist stray dogs and cats, but when Heero showed up at my door with a laptop under one arm and a beaten-up duffle bag slung over his shoulder, what was I supposed to do? My goal then became getting used to him drinking directly out of my O.J. cartons and failing to step on the rug so conveniently placed on the bathroom floor and leaving puddles on the tile when he gets out of the shower, even after I remind him 376 times. Really, Heero was an asset to my business. He took to it like a duck to water. Sure, it wasn't as exciting in piloting, but we'd both hinged our bets on the hope that those days were over. He's fast with computers and although I'd never admit it to his face, he's every bit as good a mechanic as I am. At that time, neither of us were real eager to join the Preventers. If we were going to save the world again, we were gonna do it our way, thank you very much. Besides, Wu Fei said they have to wear ties. Ties. It's sad to say, but I lost my taste for salvage. I think it was when they started dragging in pieces of colonies. We never talked about it, but I think even the Tauruses bothered Heero. It was plain enough on his face if you knew what to look for. We could sort through those damned dolls like there was no tomorrow, but the mobile suits were harder to face. I think Heero could have made himself stick it out, but he quickly agreed when I told him I'd had enough. My next goal was to find something to do with my life. The solution was ridiculously simple. What does every other eighteen-year-old boy do? Neither of us felt a burning need to be bored to tears in the attempt to finish high school, but maybe it was time for a higher education. I sold my business and we both enrolled in a university in North America on Earth. We decided not to live together. Big mistake. I don't know what we were thinking. It was only two months before we moved into an apartment off campus. We quickly learned that juice cartons and bathroom floors were nothing compared to the habits of most college students. I guess we both just found it tough to relate to regular civilian kids. Sure, some of those kids had been part of the war, but not like we had. I think he and I were a little more grateful to have each other after that. We were always kind of like a team during the wars, even before we really agreed to be. It really hit me in 196 as we ran through the halls of Dekim Barton's base, carrying machine guns and chucking grenades. It's the same now, except we run through the halls of the science buildings, carrying notebook computers and passing tests. Turns out, we already knew how to live together better than we thought. Rules such as waking Duo before 8 in the morning will result in a merciless kick to the face, or reading over Heero's shoulder will get you thrown, bodily, out of the room, have already been established. We learned to compromise on the small things, like buying Heero is own O.J. and putting his name on it so that unwitting guests don't partake since he still insists that drinking it right out of the carton saves on glasses. In the three years since, my goals have been smaller. Get Heero to come to parties, convince Heero to throw away that green tank top, talk Heero into letting me get a dog. Ok, so I haven't succeeded in any of those ones yet. Bad examples. This particular goal of kissing Heero only formed in my mind a year ago. The summer before my junior year I spent back in the colonies for a civil engineering program. Not my main focus, but required for an engineering degree. Anyway, during that time Heero held down the fort and we didn't see each other for three months. When I got back last fall, he was waiting at the spaceport as promised and the bastard actually hugged me. First time ever, I think. All I remember is that it felt damned good and when I let go and looked at him, he was… fucking hot. Now, I'd always been vaguely aware that he was pretty good looking guy, but looking at him then, I was sort of blown away. For a moment I wondered if he had changed something about his appearance, but of course he hadn't. This is Heero, and he doesn't deem most of society even worth combing his hair for, much less me who has seen him sweaty from working out, sick with the flu, and red-eyed from two all-nighters in a row. I've kept my new feelings quiet all school year. Nine months. I gave up trying to date anyone else after two months. It just seemed pointless when I'd rather be hanging out with my roommate than out on a date. Friends have noticed, but I've learned to shrug it off. Heero has noticed too, of course, and then one morning last winter, he sort of figured it out. He had made coffee and was reading the paper when I stumbled into the kitchen for my A.M. caffeine fix and sat down with him. In all my life, I will never forget what happened that morning because in just three minutes, more expressions crossed his face than in all his twenty years combined. First he suddenly raised his head and looked around like he was listening for something. Then he focused on me. "It's been rather quiet here in the mornings," he said, "you haven't had anyone over lately." I'm sure he was referring to my various past significant others tromping down the hall and banging doors on their way out in the mornings. Don't hold any illusions that Heero and I didn't have almost constant arguments about it. "Nope," I said, staring at him pointedly. Thinking back on it, I was being pretty obvious. Maybe he just caught me too early in the morning for a clever evasion or denial. He squinted his eyes and they darted around suspiciously before resting back on me. He raised one eyebrow at me questioningly. I don't know how he does that. I've stood in front of a mirror for a half hour before, and I still can't manage to do it. I just grinned back at him, showing all my teeth. Then I got the sardonic, head tilt "don't fuck with me, Duo" look. I just grinned some more. His face fell into a confused expression. I began to blush before biting my lip and shrugging helplessly. That's when he made a face I'd never seen before. Both eyebrows shot up in a look of complete Yuy Surprise. Nothing ever takes Heero by surprise. Ever. He is exasperating that way. You could tell him the sky was falling and he'd just snort at you like he figured it out four days ago. He blinked comically a few times and I knew he was onto me. His eyes sort of glazed over and he looked away. I was about ready to go burrow under my bed and die of embarrassment when he nodded slowly and a smile crept up on him as he looked back at me, still in his subdued version of confused disbelief. I grinned stupidly and shrugged again and he smiled. Not his usual smug bastard smirk, no there was a real smile on his lips as he shook his head and went back to the paper. Believe it or not, our relationship didn't really change after that. Nothing was ever said about it, we just sort of came to this weird silent understanding. I think, if one thing is different, it's that he's become more affectionate with me. This is Heero remember, so he's never gonna be real touchy feely, but he doesn't hesitate to throw his legs over my lap when we watch TV, steal my popcorn at the movies, or grab my arm in public or touch my shoulder. This spring, he made me go with him to wait for the grades to be posted for one of his final exams. It was early in the morning and we were tired and he was stressed, so we slumped down the wall to sit on the floor and he actually rested his head on my shoulder for a little while. Damn, am I gushing? Anyway, what I think I like best is that he tugs my braid just a little sometimes when he wants my attention or to let me know he's there. I can be a lot freer about touching him, too. Poking him in the chest when I tease him, mussing his hair when it gets too long, or pushing him around on the couch when he's taking up too much room. It's nice, and that's why I'm not rushing this. Like I said, we have this kind of understanding. It's like we both know how I feel and we both know what's coming. It seems like he's decided it's not all that bad and whatever happens, happens. Let me rephrase that. It's been nice and that's why I wasn't rushing this. I've decided that after nine month, an entire school year, I want to try and kiss him, so that's my goal for the summer. It's going to be an easy summer for both of us. I've got an internship that's only a few days a week, and he's doing research with a physics professor. I'm giving myself the whole three months so that I can be assured to find the right time and the right circumstances and it will be perfect. First I need to do a little reconnaissance, get a little backstory on our subject. Information gathered so far: Heero Yuy, no middle name, height 5'8", weight 145 pounds, approximate age 21, birthdate unknown, parents unknown, birthplace unknown, favorite color unknown, favorite animal unknown, favorite food unknown. Dislikes: clutter, small talk, losing, very loud music, oligarchies, weapons of mass destruction, tomatoes, Unicum, doctors, ignorance, being given gifts, modern art, admitting when he's sick, brushing his hair. Likes: reading, computers, word puzzles, when I cook dinner, educational television, sour candy, getting A's, the kitten calendar I got him for Christmas, when I kick his ass at one-on-one basketball. Ok, so I was lying about those last two. Hm, looks like I've got a ways to go. I've known him for almost six years and there are still so many unknowns. Right now, however, I know exactly what topic I'm going to breach. My victim is unwittingly doing some kind of work at the kitchen table and does not suspect a thing as I sit down across from him with a book. I read for a bit, letting the subject become used to my presence in his claimed territory. After a bit, I get up and go to the fridge to bring him a peace offering. "Something to drink?" I ask. "Just water," he answers. I bring him a bottle and sit down with my soda. He stops what he's doing to unscrew the cap and I know I have my chance. "Say Heero, can I ask you a question?" I ask casually. I remain calm so that he can't smell my fear and trigger his fight or flight response. "Yeah, sure," he shrugs, giving me an odd look. Success. "What happened with you and Relena, man?" I ask. "What?" he frowns. I know this is strange for a couple reasons. One, Heero and I do not talk about dating, and two, Heero does not talk about his feelings. Oh, he'll give you opinions, sometimes whether you want them or not, but getting him to talk about the how he feels is another matter altogether. Uncomfortable as this may make him, I'm not about to let up. "Come on," I say flippantly. "It's been four years and I've never asked. Your grace period is over, buddy. So, what happened?" He snorts. "Nothing," he replies, "that was the problem." I raise my eyebrows. Well, well, well, Heero Yuy. A side of you I've never seen. "What do you mean?" I ask, knowing exactly what he means. He shifts a little bit. He takes a deep breath launches into it, plodding on even when he can't seem to think of the right word. He looks vaguely uncomfortable and I know it's because Heero does not usually say anything unless it's pretty completely thought out first. I wonder if he's ever spoken this aloud. I doubt it. "I went with her because I thought she loved me and I had these… feelings for her. I thought she could, I don't know… help me. I thought she'd be good for me, that we'd fall in love." "But you didn't?" I hazard a guess. He tries to shrug casually but he sounds a little embarrassed as he continues. "We kissed sometimes, but it never went farther than that. She would always find some polite excuse to leave or say goodnight if I tried to touch her. I began to feel like she kept me around as… some sort of statue or a pet or something nice to look at and remind herself that there was peace now, like if I wasn't out fighting then the wars were really over. I didn't feel like she wanted to know me for… me. For who I really am and not just what she wanted me to be. So I left." Ah ha. So the needs of a young woman dedicated to maintaining peace and a young man trying to learn to be himself were different. I think Heero has discovered who he is now. I know I've discovered him. "Plus, I didn't like my job," he adds. "I might have stayed if I had liked what I was doing." "You didn't like the security stuff?" I ask. This is news to me. Come to think of it, though, I never asked how he liked it. He makes a very familiar smirk. "I think I developed a little problem with authority." "You did?" I laugh. I can't believe this has never come up before. "But you worked for me and we never had trouble." "I never disagreed with the way you ran things, Duo," he shrugs, "and I knew if I did raise an issue, you would have listened to me." "Oh, yeah," I shrug. "Do you ever have difficulty with Dr. Fotani?" "No," he shakes his head, "I actually respect her." Things are silent for a moment and I think I've got all the information that I'm going to get out of him for the moment, but he continues. "I just never felt like I could be myself with Relena. Just too many expectations. They all wanted me to be a certain way, behave the way they wanted." I nod in understanding. It's been four years since the wars, but a whole lot of assumptions are still made when people figure out who we are. It can be tough. "I mean, I could never have drank anything right out of the carton around Relena," he finishes. I laugh loudly and a smile tugs one corner of his lips. Those lips are looking terribly kissable right now, but now is not the right time. Kissing him after asking about Relena is not a good idea. No, I can wait because the timing isn't quite perfect yet. And then I just keep waiting. I always think the perfect moment will eventually present itself, but it just never does. It's towards the middle of July now and I have not even gotten close to achieving my goal. I was just at a friend's party and drank and had a good time, but then I sort of missed Heero so I came home. I know it's kind of pathetic but I don't care. People's ideas that I'm some kind of social butterfly are their own misconceptions. Heero was home and I remember being absurdly happy to see him. I procured a bottle of Tequila and cut up a lime. Like a good boy, he took the cue and found some salt. It is not a fact well known to the general public that Heero will rarely refuse Tequila shots with me on a Saturday night. I don't even think it's the alcohol that he likes, I think it's the whole ordered ritual: drink, lick, suck. Like a ceremony or a sacrament. So we shot a few rounds and I ran off at the mouth a bit and finally cajoled him into taking a walk with me. We wound up at a park and now we're swinging and bumping into each other like rowdy kids at recess. I bet if we'd had normal childhoods, the two of us would have been first-rate troublemakers. We get to talking and then just listening to the rusted metal squeak and looking at the stars. I swing over to him and jerk the nearest chain of his swing. He catches the other chain to balance himself and then looks at me. I pull him as close as I can and then lean over to kiss him. I probably don't get any closer than three inches to his lips before he bursts out laughing. Heero so rarely laughs like this, rich and deep, making even his shoulders shake, so why the hell is he doing it at such an inappropriate time?! I turn beet red. "Heero!" I groan. He continues to laugh and I push away from him. "What is so goddamn funny?" I demand petulantly. I would be seriously pissed off at him right now if he weren't so unbelievably gorgeous when he laughs. "With the reputation you have, I - I thought you'd be all slick or something," he manages to calm himself long enough to say, "but instead, you get me drunk and make me go on a walk with you!" He peels with laughter again and I get up from my swing with a dejected huff. "You know, Yuy," I grumble, trying not to slur, "I think I liked you better when you didn't laugh." I find the nearest grassy patch to flop onto my back and steam to myself. I don't really feel like kissing that jerk anymore anyway. I can't believe he insulted my technique - AND my reputation! Heero falls into the grass next to me after a few moments, his shoulder amiably touching mine. I can't really stay mad with him so close and we fall into a more comfortable silence. After a bit, he complains about being bored so we go home. The next day, nothing is said about it but I swear to God that son of a bitch has had a little smile on his face all day, even though I know his hangover has to be at least as persistent as mine. It's kind of cute really, that my bungling attempt at kissing him makes him smile like this. I'm not really angry at him anymore either. Trying to kiss him when we were drunk was pretty stupid. That's not exactly the way to tell someone you really care about them and want to start a relationship. I feel dumb about that, but oh well. It's not like he totally rejected me, he didn't even push me away, he just… laughed. And hey, making Heero laugh is something, right? And now he's smiling to himself when he thinks I'm not paying attention. He's going to have to do worse than that if he wants to discourage me. I knew kissing Heero would not be easy, and you might say I can be an ambitious little bastard when I want something. I'm taking my sweet time with attempt number two. If he cares, he's not letting on. This is kind of a fun little dance, making him guess when I might try again. I've gotten really close to him a few times, often in our small kitchen. He's suddenly decided to give cooking an earnest try, and it's gotten us close enough for me to watch his pupils dilate and his eyes flick down to my lips. It's giving me confidence, which is good because failing a second time will not make me real happy. I've been rejected my fair share of times, but I never took hard in the past. It's different with Heero, though. It's like everything so far has only been build up to this, that this is the really important one. I really want this and his responses have been positive, but I can't help worrying it's one of those things where he doesn't want me but feels too bad to tell me. I like to think I can read him better then that, but I can't help worrying about it anyway. It's well into August before I try again. The perfect moment just never came. I wouldn't say I'm getting desperate, but I'd like to achieve my goal of doing it this summer. Damn, when did I become such a chicken? I stop at the market for a few more ingredients on the way home from my internship and holler "I'm home!" when I come in the door, even though I see my apartment mate is right there on the couch eight feel away. I change my clothes and when I come back, Heero is hovering around the kitchen. I tell him which vegetables to chop and he tries to make me quantify "dice" with an exact measurement. He frets just slightly when I laugh at him. Swear to God he was about ready to go get a measuring tape. I wonder about him sometimes. We make dinner and I help him clean up. He settles onto the couch with the paper when we're done. I just kind of look at him sitting there when I come into the room. His head and neck are visible above the back of the couch. You know, he isn't the scrawny kid he used to be. He's still on the lanky side, but his body filled out. His neck, however, remains long and sexy, the sort you want to graze your teeth up… How is he so damned attractive just sitting there on the couch? And before you say anything, this isn't just about me wanting Heero's body in ways that used to be, and quite possibly still are, illegal. No, this is about me coming home last fall and suddenly realizing that my best friend is everything I ever wanted - and gives great hugs when he feels like it. Somewhere along the line, it hit me that nothing else is going to satisfy me. I sneak up behind him and peer over his shoulder. "Why, Heero Yuy, you're not reading the horoscopes, are you?" I tease. "No, I'm reading this," he tells me, pointing to the column directly to the right. I should have known. "Suuuuure," I say without conviction. I lean over the back of the couch, right over his shoulder, and situate myself firmly in his personal space so I can read the paper. His face twitches humorously in annoyance and he moves to give me some room. "What's your sign, Heero?" I ask. "I don't know," he answers, "I just change my age when the year changes." "Well, you're no fun," I say, "but that makes you a…" I look through the list and find January. "Aquarius. You are Aquarius." "What is that?" he asks disapprovingly. "I have no idea," I tell him before I prepare to read. "Duo, I'm going to assume you know this is really stupid and you are just reading it to annoy me. Really, I don't know why credible new sources even allow these things anymore. The idea itself is preposterous. People do not develop personalities based on the date they are born. Genetic composition and environmental influences are much too strong of forces for anything as remote as the alignment of planets to have any - " "Aquarius," I cut in loudly, "You should find that you have an extra amount of creative energy at this time, and you should do what you can to make this force work for you. There is a time and place for everything, and now is the time to work together with your higher self to channel some of the artist within you. Don't let your self-doubt keep you from using the creative force that is brewing inside you." He rolls his eyes. "Thank you for enlightening me. I will have to consult the wisdom of you and your mystical planets again sometime." "Ok, now me," I say as I scan the page for my birthday. "You don't know your birthday either," he reminds me as if I'd forgotten. "You just picked one arbitrarily." "Shhhh," I put a hand over his mouth. "There I am! Aries. You are apt to find yourself in a romantic mode today, Aries. Your whole persona is apt to revolve around love and romance, and you will find that your romantic side is heightened. This is a terrific day to snuggle up close to a loved one and share intimate moments and passionate kisses. Ow!" I exclaim and then keep reading as I retract my hand from his teeth, "You should feel confident and free to take on anything." Well now. I think I just started to believe in horoscopes. My day for romance, huh? I want to snuggle with only one person, and at this very moment he's sitting so close I can practically smell him. I know I'm grinning like a maniac when he gives me a quizzical single-eyebrow lift. "Does your inner artist want to share my passionate kisses?" I ask as I practically climb over the back of the couch to get at him. I wet my lips and close my eyes as I start to lean over the mere inches between us. I start to think I should have met his lips by now when the laughing starts. "Duo!" he laughs riotously. "You… missed!" I open my eyes just in time to find my face on a collisions course with his shoulder. I fling my arms out to catch myself and then totally lose my balance. Still laughing, he leaps nimbly out of my way and I tumble, limbs flailing madly, onto the couch. Heero about doubles over in laughter watching me try to right myself and inevitably crash ass over teakettle on the floor. "Duo!" he wheezes, holding his middle. Wow, I must be quite a sight. I glower at him from the floor. I give up. There's just no being smooth around that jerk. Maybe I should just grab him, throw his ass to the couch, and hold him still for a moment. And that slippery bastard had to have moved! Ace pilot Duo Maxwell does not miss! "Duo," he sighs, "what are you doing?" "Well, clearly I am testing the springyness of our couch and the softness of our carpet," I retort sarcastically, "Oh yes, high quality, this one. Hurt my ass 45% less than the leading brand. Really, Yuy, you should thank me for - " "You could have anyone." "Why do you keep saying things like that?" I demand and jump to my feet to defend myself. "I've been rejected! I've been dumped! I don't get everything I want! Especially not lately, not you!" I think I catch a glimpse of nearly-complete Yuy Surprise as I storm to my room and slam the door. Really, now. That could only have been more childish if we had stairs I could stomp up like a proper upset teenager, but man is he pissing me off. I flop onto my bed to wallow in my dejection. Where is he getting these crazy ideas about me, anyway? That I am somehow slick or seductive, or that I could have anyone I wanted. Doesn't he know me better than that? We don't talk about relationships much, but we must spend eight hours a day together. We've seen each other in all cringe-worthy of states of illness, injury, and uncleanliness, going all the way back to the wars. Hasn't Heero figured out that I'm not such an amazing catch? I'm not once-in-a-lifetime special or pants-wettingly attractive. I'm just me. Just Duo who scratches himself in his sleep, rates just below moss on the humanity scale before 9 AM, and falls off of perfectly large and stable pieces of furniture like the klutz he is. Maybe in his warped little mind I'm some kind of… Well, damn. Could it be that someone is just as insecure as I am? I grumble and roll onto my back. Well at any rate, that doesn't excuse him laughing at me - both times! It's like he doesn't take this, or me, seriously. I mean, if he doesn't want me, why doesn't he just say so, damn it? He can't just keep avoiding my attempts like this. What's a guy gotta do to get noticed around here, anyway? Go wait naked in his bed? I groan when I think of him laughing at that, too. Great, now I'm really going to turn into chicken shit. I'm pretty pissed off, but like a sucker, I know I'll try again. I'll try again until he all but shoves me away. Yeah, I want him that bad. Like I said, nothing else is going to do it for me. I'll get over this and make an idiot out of myself for him yet again. But not right now because I'm not really done fuming here. Just need a little time. I wake up the next morning not feeling any better about it and not exactly relishing the idea of talking to Heero, but coffee was calling my name. My room is darker than it should be at this time in the morning and I can hear the rain outside. Fucking great, a gloomy day and a reminder that summer is ending and I haven't kissed Heero yet. I roll out of bed and shrug into a rumpled button-down I find near my bed, buttoning it as I stumble down the hall to the kitchen. "Good morning," Heero says evenly from the table when he sees me. Heero's presence is less than thrilling to me at the moment and wouldn't you know, I just don't feel like talking to him. I don't even want to look at him, with his sexy bedhair and slept-in teeshirt. I fill a mug with coffee and find the cream and sugar he takes out for me every morning. I stir briskly with more loud clinks than necessary and then go to the window bench instead of to the table. In my opinion, the bay window doesn't make up for not having a balcony, but I don't think the owners of the building are terribly concerned with my thoughts on the matter. I sit on the narrow ledge by the window and not on the padded bench because I know it annoys Heero that I never sit on the part that's actually made for sitting. I sullenly look out at the rain and drink my coffee even though I know it's too hot. I hear his bare feet padding in my direction, but I don't turn around. I continue to ignore him when he tugs gently on my braid. "Duo…" he says tentatively, "about last night. I… I hope I didn't scare you off." Nope, still don't feel like talking to him. I just continue to stare out the window. "Would you believe me if I said I was nervous?" he asks after a moment. "Right," I snort and look up at him, "and what, pray tell, does Heero Yuy have to be nervous about?" "Well," he answers me. I swear his voice is wavering just the tiniest bit. "For one, losing his best friend if he fucks it up as bad as he thinks he will." I swallow. Well, shit. "And it doesn't help that he thinks… he already did." I blink up at him in bewilderment, trying not to let my burning mug land in my lap. He takes advantage of my baffled state and rests one knee on the bench as his hands reach for me. When I look down, he's carefully fixing the places where I buttoned my shirt wrong. I just gape at his hands as they work patiently, deliberately over my shirt. He leaves the shirt open at the chest and rests his warm hand over my skin as he leans back a little to look in my eyes. It feels like my eyes are so wide and bugging out of my head, they've got to be screaming 'kiss me, you idiot!" At least, I hope they are, because I can't say my mouth is exactly working at the moment. I feel his fingers slide lightly up over my throat and come to rest on my cheek. His lids lower halfway, making his eyes look so soft and blue. My eyes close as he leans over. When his lips meet mine, I am in serious danger of dumping the contents of my mug onto very delicate and valuable part of my anatomy. His mouth is strong and hot, exactly like the way he likes his coffee. I open my lips to let him taste the sugar and cream in mine. His tongue enters and I brace my free hand on the back of his neck, pulling him closer and steadying myself at the same time. He continues to kiss me and I wonder why I waited so long. There was never going to be a perfect moment because every moment is right with him somehow. He pulls away slowly and lifts the mug from my unsteady hand. He's smiling. He's trying to make it look smug, but he can't quite manage it. He sets my mug down safely and climbs up to crowd in next to me by the window. I get another short kiss before he wordlessly puts an arm around my waist and we watch the rain together. I can't say I'm displeased with the results, but I never did achieve my goal of kissing him since it was him who kissed me. But that's Heero. He never did like doing anything anyone else's way.

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