Lot no. 37 (Mustang and Mistletoe) Part 1

by Granate, 2006


Disclaimer: Don't own, not making any money!

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They'd faced off across the big wooden desk so many times over the years, it was almost like second nature.  Quite frankly, they'd had arguments a lot uglier than this.  This was tame.  This was civil.  If only because the Colonel failed in seeing that there should be an argument at all.  He sat placidly in his chair, elbows on the desk and fingers laced.

"It's a tradition, Fullmetal," he said simply.

"Don't you 'Fullmetal' me!" Ed growled.

"It's harmless, you're making a big deal out of nothing."

"Call them.  Cancel it."

"Come on, where's your holiday spirit?  It's the season for giving, for sharing," Mustang teased, unable not to provoke Ed just a little bit.

Ed put his palms flat on the desk and leaned over with a scowl.  He spoke slowly as if the other man was hard of hearing or slow of wit: "I'm not sharing."

"You won't have to," Mustang tried to assure him, "nothing will happen.  I told you, it's nothing to worry about.  It's all in good fun."

"Oh really?  Is that why the description promises mistletoe?" Ed challenged, slapping a gloved metal hand on the brochure on the desk with a bang.  "I know perfectly well what that implies, I wasn't born yesterday!  Is that why you didn't ask me first?  Or even bother to tell me?"

"It completely slipped my mind and, for your information, they didn't ask me either.  I guess it's been going on for so many years, they thought it was a given."

Ed glowered at him.  "Exactly how many years has it been going on?" he asked, not sure he wanted to know.  

"Oh, since I became an officer," Mustang said casually, either not bothering to or not wanting to total up the years.

The younger alchemist gave him an incredulous look.  "Just how does something like this get started, anyway?" he asked.

Mustang folded his arms over his chest and tilted his nose into the air.  "It just so happens that my first year I couldn't find a date for the New Year's Eve Officer's Ball and some of the guys thought it would be funny to auction me off at the Annual Charity Auction the military holds."

"Come on, we both know you can lie better than that," Ed scoffed, vaguely insulted by the apparent lack of effort on Mustang's part.

"Oh, I most certainly can.  The truth is rarely pretty, is it?  Needless to say, they didn't ask me that year either," Roy said with a tight, humorless smile.

"You couldn't find a date.  You expect me to believe that?" Ed spat.

Roy gave him a flat look.  "If I was going to lie, wouldn't I make up a better story than not being able to find a date?  Wouldn't I say that, perhaps, so many women wanted to be my date that they had to auction me off?"

"So… you really couldn't find a date?"

"Yes."

"Really?"

"Yes."

"You?"

"Yes."

Ed made a couple of snorting and choking noises before finally exploding with laughter.

Mustang tapped his fingertips on the desk in irritation.  "Your sensitivity never fails, Fullmetal," he ground out.

"You couldn't get a date!" Ed wheezed, slapping the desk a few times.

"I was shy!" Mustang snapped.

Ed sprayed spit all over the paperwork on his desk as he doubled over, holding his stomach as he shook with laughter.

The colonel leaned his temple on his fist.  "Are we done here?  I have things to do," he reminded the young man, adopting a bored tone.

Ed recovered when he remembered what they had been arguing about.  "Look, can't you tell them you can't do it this year?" he asked, straightening up a bit.

"I'm sorry, Ed, but I'm their highest seller.  There would be an uproar," the man claimed, maddening smirk curling his lips again.

Ed just gave him an ugly look.

"Listen, it's not as if you can be my date," Roy reminded him more seriously.  "Are you even going?"

"Well, no, I wasn't planning on it," Ed admitted.

"Exactly, so what am I supposed to tell them?" Mustang asked, opening his hands in the air.  "Everyone thinks I'm single.  What would you have me do, make an announcement that I'm currently involved with my underage subordinate and so therefore cannot participate in this year's auction?

Ed kept his growling to himself this time.  Having to hide what they were up to was no fun, but he'd known that when he got himself into this.  "Come on, put your sneaky underhandedness to good use for once, you can come up with something to tell them," he persisted.

"Ed, it's really not a big deal.  Please just let it slide?"

"Why are you acting like I'm the one who's out of line, when you're the one auctioning yourself off to women?  Don't I have a right to be mad?" Ed asked, growing angry again.  "Why is it some incomprehensible shock to you that I'm upset about this?  You've been doing this every year since you became an officer and your girlfriends have been ok with it?  I can't believe that!"

Roy pursed his lips and rubbed his chin in thought.  "In truth, I'm usually single this time of year because, well, when it becomes clear that you don't intend to bring a girl home for the holidays and introduce her to your parents, she doesn't always take it well."

Ed growled something through clenched teeth but Mustang didn't seem to notice.

"But about the auction, I recall there was one year I was seeing someone and she didn't mind," Roy said.  "And another year I let someone dump me over it because I wanted to break up with her anyway."

"What?" Ed gulped.  "Is that what this is?  You're hoping I'll break up with you?!"

"Wait, Ed -"

"Well, you know what, asshole?" Ed fumed as he leaned dangerously over the desk again and thrust a gloved index finger in Mustang's face.  "You're not going to get your way!" he swore.  "Just to punish you, I'm NOT going to break up with!  You're stuck with me, how do you like that?  If you want to get rid of me, you'll have to grow some balls and do it yourself!  Until then, you're just going to have to deal with me!"

In a furious swirl of red, Ed was out the door.  The slam that announced his exit rattled the walls and shelves of Colonel Mustang's office.

Ed stormed through the building and it wasn't until he kicked his way out of the front doors that he thought maybe he'd been a little rash.  He'd basically just invited Roy to break up with him.  Sure, he was mad, but he didn't want that.  Perhaps charging in making demands hadn't been the right way to handle things.  He should know better than anyone that direct confrontation was a sure way to get Mustang's defenses up because they were so much alike that way.  He shuffled through the snow towards the bench where his brother was waiting.  

"Well, how did it go?" Al asked as his big brother approached.

It had been Al who had shown him the auction brochure this morning.  Ed was oblivious to most things that weren't part of his research, so he didn't even know about the auction.  The brothers had never been in Central City for New Year's before, they had either been in Riesenburg or on a research trip somewhere, so they'd never experienced Central Headquarter's winter charity fundraising effort.  There was the auction, a toy drive, a bake sale, a variety show, and other events all week, culminating in the New Year's Eve Officer's Ball.  The ball was the final gala where they would total up all the money they'd raised, present the checks to the charities, and party into the new year.

"I'm probably going to get dumped," Ed reported glumly and plopped down next to his brother.

"Oh no," Al said sympathetically.

"I kind of lost my temper," Ed frowned and pushed his hair out of his eyes.

"Nii-san," Al sighed.

"Well, he made me mad!  He didn't even see what was wrong with it!  He refused to withdraw his participation," Ed relayed.  "And then he kind of implied that if I had a problem with it, I could just dump him."

"What did you do?" Al asked.

Ed pulled his coat tighter around him.  "I told him that I wasn't going to give in to his games and he would have to dump me himself if he wanted to get rid of me," he answered.

"How did that go over?" Al asked.  

Ed knew his brother well enough to imagine the exasperated face he would be making right now if he could.  "Uh, I don't know.  That's when I stormed out," he admitted.

Al sighed again.  He didn't really understand how his brother and Colonel Mustang's new relationship worked, but he much preferred it to the time when Ed had hated the Colonel.  "Nii-san, you need to compromise, remember?"

"Oh yeah.  Compromise," Ed grumbled. Compromise was never Ed's first instinct.  Al said it was hardly part of his vocabulary.  Refusing to compromise had gotten him this far in life, but his… thing with Mustang was a different story.  It wasn't something that could be explained with scientific reasoning; it wasn't something he could research or think his way through with just logic.  Maybe the way to keep Roy was to compromise a bit here and there.  He wished he'd thought of that, oh, say fifteen minutes ago.  

In truth, Ed was still having some trouble adjusting from a rocky work relationship to a rocky romantic relationship.  How much could he give without becoming the man's doormat?  He'd gotten over wondering if Roy was going along with this in order to control him, but that didn't mean the man was any less dangerous.  If he had learned one thing after knowing Mustang for five years, it was that manipulating people into positions where he wanted them was simply his nature, even if it wasn't intended maliciously.

"All right, so it didn't go well," Al said.  "I'm sure you have a plan.  I mean, you don't want it to end, do you?"

"No, I don't want it to end," Ed said and then a glint appeared in his gold eyes.  "So here's my plan: I'm going to go to the ball and surprise him!"

"Don't you mean babysit him?" Al said dryly.

"Well, maybe that too, but we can make up there.  I'll make sure to look really good and grown-up and be nice so he doesn't want to dump me," Ed continued.

Al kept his sigh to himself.  His brother was supposed to be a genius, yet sometimes he was so thick in the head.  "Nii-san, I don't think that's really the right answer.  You should probably go back to the office and get it straightened out right now," he advised.

"No no, this'll work.  Every officer can purchase two tickets, so you can come with me!  All I have to do is make sure I don't get dumped before then."

"Which means avoiding him for the next four days," Al guessed, knowing his brother all too well.

"It'll be a cinch!" Ed insisted.  It would be good for him, he decided.  A little time without Roy might do him some good.  Even when he was in town, they didn't see each other out of the office every day, his research and fixing Al were still his top priorities.  Ed kept up his long, hard work hours, but sometimes it was hard not to think about sex.  Well, it hadn't been hard at all until Roy had introduced him to the subject a month and a half ago.  Before Roy, he'd been perfectly content not to have that kind of distraction in his life.  A couple days without that influence wouldn't be so bad.  

+

After that, Ed was a man on a mission.  That night he and Al switched rooms in the dorms, even though he was pretty sure Roy would give him a night to "cool off" before trying to find him.  IF Roy even cared enough to try and talk to him.  The next day, Ed debated not going to the First Branch Library since that would be an obvious place for Roy to look for him, but he ultimately decided he needed to go anyway.  

He found a table far out of the main area, deep in the labyrinth of the First Branch Library.  He knew he would be difficult to find, but he was still distracted all morning, listening for Roy's voice and jumping at footsteps behind him.  He really wasn't getting much done this way, so he decided to go grab one more book on his list and then take them to the checkout desk.  On his way back to his table he spotted Roy through some gaps in the shelved books.  He ducked behind a nearby ladder and held his breath as Roy walked right past his aisle.  Over the top of a row of books, Ed watched Roy find the table with the red coat and sit down to wait for him.  He felt silly for the way his heart pounded.  Roy had come to find him.  But to make up, or to dump him?  Ed couldn't take the chance.  He ducked again as the seated man craned his neck and looked around for a short blond alchemist.  

Roy waited a lot longer than Ed anticipated, so Ed hunkered down behind the ladder, sitting and pulling his knees up.  He could still be seen, but it was unlikely that he'd be noticed.  There was something to be said for being small.
He watched Roy pick up his red coat and curiously inspect it.  Roy examined the hood and the sleeves and pondered the symbol on the back for a moment.  Ed was a little affronted by this invasion of privacy, but it wasn't like the man had gone through his pockets or something.  Roy put the coat back on the empty chair and picked up one of Ed's books on embryology and tissue development.  

He read it for so long that Ed took out the book he was carrying and began to read, too.  Ed realized that half an hour had passed, and Mustang was still engrossed, with no thought to where he was or how long he'd been there.  Roy was really just as bad as he was.  That was something Ed had learned over the years: that Roy Mustang lived and breathed alchemy the same way he did.  Discovering that fact had been what finally started to change Ed's feelings about the man.  Ed felt a strange longing to go out there and sit down with him.  Actually, what he wanted to do was go out there and kiss him, right here in the library.  Ed looked at the carpet and fiddled with the hem of his black shirt.  

After forty-five minutes, Mustang suddenly sat up and looked at his pocket watch.  He very quickly got up, arranged the chair and the table, and hurried out of the library.  Ed let out a sigh of relief and came out of hiding.  Roy hadn't left a note.  Of course, Ed hadn't been expecting a note that gave away anything about the man's intentions, but he hadn't left a note saying he'd been there at all or that he was looking for Ed.  Ed didn't know what to think about that.  When he looked around at his things, everything was exactly the way he'd left it, even the way the coat hung over the chair.  He'd never have known Roy was here unless he'd seen him.  Ed figured it could be some kind of habit, but the fact remained that Mustang was one sneaky bastard.   

Ed read in peace for the rest of the afternoon, but the situation nagged at him.  He still had no idea if Roy wanted to patch things up or end it all together.  Not knowing bothered him, and he was beginning to wonder if perhaps Al had a point, but he was betting all his chips on the night of the ball.  Maybe it was just his stupid pride, but he'd made the plan and he was sticking to it.  Okay, so it wasn't just stupid pride - he was scared.  He had realized this as he watched Mustang read his book.  He was so afraid of being dumped that he couldn't bring himself to face Roy, and now he'd started down this path and didn't know how to stop himself.  Ed shook his head to clear it.  The ball, he reminded himself.  He could still fix everything.  It was going to be all right, he just had to make it to the ball.

Ed brought plenty of books home so that he could avoid the library the next day.  In the evening, an unexpected knock at the door startled them both.  Ed whirled around and stared at the door.  Whoever it was rapped a second time and Ed flew into action.

"It's him!" he hissed to his brother as he threw books into his suitcase.

"What are you doing?" Al hissed back

"Getting out of here!  Come on!" Ed blustered as he pulled Al towards the wall.  Ed quickly transmuted a door into the next room and shoved his brother through it, tossing the suitcase after him.  As soon as he was safely on the other side, Ed made the door disappear and pressed his ear to the wall.

"I don't believe this," Al said, clearly annoyed.

Ed shushed him and strained to listen.  There was another knock and then the sound of the door opening, followed by boots on the wooden floor.

"That nosy bastard just used alchemy to break into our room!" Ed choked.

"And you just used alchemy to break into an empty room and run away from him!" Al threw back.

"I can't believe this!  Does that self-important jerk know any boundaries at all?" Ed growled

"Ugh!  I don't want to hear it from you, you two are exactly the same!" Al exclaimed, knowing full well he wasn't getting through to his brother.

They both went silent when they heard Roy call out Ed's name.  It sounded like he was looking around the room for a moment and then the door closed.  Ed refused to move back into the other room that night, and Al finally gave up trying to convince him.

Ed changed rooms again the next morning, to a distant wing of the dorms, and then proceeded to hide out there all day.  Al refused to be cooped up all day and went out to visit an alchemy shop in the afternoon.  

"If you talk to that colonel, I'll transmute you into a car," Ed threatened.

Al rolled his eyes.  "Don't worry, idiot brother, I don't want any part in this stupid game the two of you are playing," he said before leaving.

Ed read his books until about three o'clock when he got so hungry he couldn't concentrate anymore.  Why hadn't he thought to bring food back here yesterday?  Now he was going to have to go out.  At least there was a bakery close by.  He could get a loaf of bread and some muffins and not have to leave at all this evening or tomorrow.  Well, he would have to go to the auction tomorrow to check out the winner of Lot no. 37, but other than that, it would be smooth sailing until the ball the following day.  Except for getting a tuxedo and buying his tickets at Headquarters.  Ed frowned in displeasure.  

But first things first, he decided, and threw on a coat to go out and get some food.  He felt like a paranoid idiot sneaking through the streets and looking over his shoulder so psychotically.  Al's voice popped into his head, saying, "You are a paranoid idiot, nii-san!" but Ed dismissed it as he entered the bakery.  He selected his purchases and hurried back towards the dorms with a brown paper bag under his arm.  

His heart nearly stopped when he turned a corner and heard very familiar laughter.  Roy Mustang was walking with a group of people about fifteen feet in front of him, their backs to Ed.  

"Shit!" Ed squeaked and dove into an alley.  It had looked like a party of high-ranking officers, on the way back to Headquarters from who knows where.  He heard Mustang's voice and then more laughter from the group.  It sounded like they were moving a safe distance away so Ed peeked out of the alley.  Lt. Hawkeye, who was walking at the back of the group, turned around and Ed dove for cover again, hoping she hadn't seen him.  He stayed in the alley, trying to calm his nerves, until he was absolutely sure Mustang's party was gone.  He hurried back to the dorms, glad that this was almost over with.  

Roy Mustang strode through his outer room to his office and hung up his coat.  Hawkeye was tailing him as usual and closed the door as he sat down at his desk again.  She handed him the day's mail and loitered about the great wooden desk.

"Is there any reason, sir, that Edward Elric might be avoiding you?" she asked, voice lacking any kind of inflection.

The Colonel didn't look up from the letter he was reading.  "And why would we be expecting a social call from Fullmetal?  He hates me and would rather chew off his own good arm than come to my office for a visit," he reminded her.

"I saw him hide in an alley when you passed him on the street this afternoon," she said.

"We passed him in town?" Mustang asked, surprised.  "Well, I was walking with some of the big wigs and being pleasant with them is even more strenuous for him than being pleasant with me.  I still don't understand why you find this behavior surprising, Lieutenant."

She snatched the paper out of his hands and pinned him with a look that made him cringe, and he thought he was used to all her killer looks.  He suddenly felt like a fool for thinking he'd managed to keep his and Ed's relationship a secret from her for the last six weeks.  

"Does this have anything to do with the shouting match in here on Monday?" she pressed.

"I don't remember shouting," he squirmed.

"Edward shouted enough for the both of you.  I believe I heard rather clearly that you needed to 'grow some balls,'" she said pointedly.  "What have you done?"

Mustang pursed his lips, trying to decide how much to admit.  "He thinks it's disgraceful of me to be in the charity auction," he told her, careful not to divulge too much.

Hawkeye backed off a bit, giving him at least some room to breathe.  "He's angry," she surmised, crossing her arms.

"Yes, angry," the Colonel said, leaving it at that diplomatic understatement.

"But you can't back out of it."

"No, not this late," Roy nearly sighed.

"What are you going to do?" she asked flatly.

"I'd like to talk it over with him."

"But he's avoiding you," she reminded him.

"Yes, and therein lies my problem exactly, thank you for your scintillating summary, Lieutenant," the Colonel said dryly.

She gave him an unamused look.  

They were interrupted by Havoc knocking on the door.  "Someone to see you, Sir," the Second Lieutenant said.

+

"You're going to the auction now?" Al asked, seeing his brother to the door.

"Yup, it's time," Ed replied.

"You're not going to hurt anyone, are you, nii-san?" Al sighed.

"No, I'm not going to hurt anyone," Ed replied.

"Want me to come with you?" Al offered.  

"I'd say yes, but it's got to be a covert mission," Ed told him.  "I'm going incognito."

"I see that," Al said dryly.  His brother had colored his hair black, he wore a big black coat instead of his customary red one, he had a hat pulled down over his eyes, and if that wasn't enough, he wore sunglasses.  At night.  "You're still avoiding him," Al surmised.

"I'm just going to see who wins the auction, I don't want him to see me there," Ed explained.

"Nii-san, you're making this way harder than it has to be," Al shook his head, "you don't have to pull crazy stunts like this, just go there and make up with him tonight."

"No, it has to be at the ball," Ed persisted stubbornly.  "Besides, there will probably be tons of people around him tonight.  I probably won't get a chance to talk to him alone, you know?"

"How is it going to be any better at the ball, when he's got a date to take care of?" Al argued,

"Fine, Al, I freely admit that I don't know what the hell I'm doing, ok?" Ed said exasperatedly.  "I just want to go to the ball and show him my adult side.  That's how I want him to see me, that's how I want to make up with him.  Not like this," Ed finished, looking down at his outfit.

"Oh, nii-san, you know I'm on your side, right?" Al asked, feeling guilty for being so argumentative.

"I know, Al," Ed said, looking up with a weak smile.

"I want you two to patch things up," Al said firmly.

"Me too," Ed said with a nod.  "I just... I don't know how to keep him," he added, eyes downcast.  The keeping was really the hard part, it had been that way all his life.  He'd barely managed to keep Al.  "Well, anyway," he said more confidently and flipped his hood up, "forget it.  Doesn't matter.  I'll be back in an hour or so, Al."

"Wait a minute there, nii-san," Al said, snagging him by the hood as he tried to leave.  He turned his big brother around and tugged the hood down.  "How long have you been working for the Colonel, now?" Al asked.

Ed gave him a confused look.  "Five years?" he answered.

"Right," Al said, "so don't you think he knows you pretty well by now?  Including all your bad sides?"  Al gave him a little shake by hood of his coat, like he was holding a kitten by the scruff of its neck.

"Yeah," Ed had to agree.  Mustang knew more bad sides than he really would care to admit he had.

"So, if he's with you after all that, then there still must be some things he likes about you," Al pointed out.

"You don't have to make me sound so horrible," Ed complained.  

"What I'm saying, nii-san," Al said, with another gentle shake, "is that you shouldn't worry about how to 'keep him.'  Just be yourself.  That's what he likes - crazy stunts and all, I suspect."

Ed looked up at his little bother.  "Since when do you know so much about love, Al?" he asked, almost suspiciously.

"Love?  That's just common sense," Al said, and if a suit of armor could gloat, Al would be doing it at that moment.

Ed managed to free himself and bid his brother goodbye again before heading out the door.  "Common sense," he muttered to himself as he stuffed his hands in his pockets.  His brother was smart and sensitive but what Al didn't know was that when it came to love, common sense pretty much went out the window.

The auction was a fancier event then Ed had assumed, but still very lively.  It was a held in Central's smaller but very ornate meeting hall, which was decorated with ribbons and seasonal plant arrangements.  There were a few wet bars along the side of the room and an open area for socializing.  A small string ensemble played music from the back of the room.  Rows of chairs were set up in front of a platform where the items up for auction were displayed.  Ed had to chuckle when he saw that Lt. Col. Hughes was acting as auctioneer.

Ed arrived while lot no. 30 was being auctioned off.  He stayed toward the back wall so that he wouldn't draw attention to himself.  He wouldn't exactly mix in with cocktail dresses and suit coats.  Hughes stood at the microphone on the platform and two assistants showed the item up for bid.  Ed recognized the assistants as Gracia and Shezka, and smiled to himself.  There was also a large picture of the item projected on a screen behind the stage so that the people in the back could get a better look.

The bidding on the next few items went fairly quickly.  Hughes really kept things moving.  Ed just milled about in the back, trying not to draw attention to himself.  Around lot 35, the seats began to fill in.  Mostly with women, he noticed.  Annoyed, he folded his arms and burrowed deeper into the collar of his trench coat.  Hopefully, Hughes would keep lot no. 37 moving along, too.

Of course, he didn't.  After the winner of lot 36 was decided, even the lighting and the music in the room changed.  The excited tittering of the women in the main seating ceased and Hughes leaned close the microphone.  

"And now, ladies and gentlemen," he said, abandoning the rapid auctioneer's speech, "the moment you've all been waiting for."

Ed half expected some booing from the male faction of the room, but the company was a little too polite for that here.  Maybe at the next battle assessment.

"Lot number 37: Mustang and Mistletoe!" Hughes announced.  His lovely assistants drew back the curtain and Roy strode onstage.  He was wearing a suit instead of his uniform and looking every bit like a fashion model.  He stood at the front of the stage under the lights looking unshakably calm and aloof.  At least he wasn't strutting around and winking at the ladies, Ed thought.    

"The winner of this lot receives Colonel Roy Mustang's second ticket to the New Year's Eve Officer's Ball!" Hughes continued.  "Col. Mustang is known as the Flame Alchemist and is renowned for his service to the Amestris Military."  Two pictures of Roy appeared on the screen behind him, one of him saluting in his normal uniform and the other of him using his flame alchemy.  

"The winner is entitled to a bouquet of roses, a limousine to the ball, a fairytale evening of drinking and dancing, and a kiss at midnight," Hughes exclaimed from the podium.  "The winner also gets to choose whether Col. Mustang should wear the military dress uniform, or traditional formalwear."  The pictures on the screen were replaced with one of Roy in the dress uniform and one of him in a tuxedo.  In the picture of him wearing the tuxedo, he held a glass of champagne and wore a characteristic smirk.  There was also some manner of decoration in the background with this year's date on it, which meant it was probably from last year's ball.

Ed was surprised with how low bidding started, but the price rose quickly with no sign of slowing down.  Women were aggressively holding up their numbers and Hughes spoke faster than should be humanly possible to keep up with them.  Roy just stood there like he wasn't paying attention to what was going on and Ed wondered if it was an act, or if he'd really gotten used to it.  Ed thought it was weird.  He had this urge to run up there and pull Roy offstage, put him in a room somewhere where he didn't have to be on display like that.  He wished again that Roy had found some way out of it.  

"And sold to the lovely lady in green!" Hughes declared from the podium, bringing the gavel down.  There were both groans and excited chattering in the crowd.  "Miss Green, please have your check ready and see our staff backstage for further instruction.  Thank you all."

Roy bowed and turned smartly on his heel.  Gracia and Shezka held the curtain and he disappeared behind it.  

After Lot no. 37, Ed didn't have much interest in the auction, so he took the opportunity to make his exit as Hughes introduced the next item.  He'd gotten a look at the winner, which was why he'd come.  She wasn't that pretty, he decided.  He got Roy's company without having to pay for it, if that was any consolation.  Which it wasn't, at the moment, because he was on the verge of losing Roy's company all together.

He buttoned up his black coat as he left the room, unaware that he was being followed through the hallway.  He had a lot on his mind, so it was understandable.  He reached for the door handle and pulled, but a hand shot out from behind him, stopping the door.  He spun around and backed into the door.  Roy was leaning directly over him, hand still on the door.  His eyes were narrow, heavy-lidded, and dark.

"You've been avoiding me," he said.

"C-colonel, someone might see," Ed stuttered nervously.  He'd staved off those sex-thoughts for three days, and they couldn't have chosen a worse moment to come flooding back.  There was something in Roy's voice or his eyes, or maybe in the air between them.  He was about to get dumped and all Ed could think about was peeling off that fancy suit of Roy's, one piece at a time.

The man straightened up.  "Then why don't I accompany you outside?" he suggested.

"Ok," Ed mumbled and turned to the door.  His heart sank and his chest got all tight as he opened the door.  He didn't even feel the cold air outside or hear the crunch of snow under their boots.  He knew it couldn't have gone on forever, but he still really, really didn't want to be dumped.  He wasn't ready for this, Roy had caught him off guard.  He'd planned to have this conversation on his terms.  He wanted to take Roy by surprise, not the other way around.

Roy followed him outside and then took his arm to steer him around the corner of the building.  Though Roy could be rough in bed when Ed pushed his buttons just right, he was nothing but smooth in normal interaction.  Ed very much resented being treated like a naughty child about to be scolded.

"Don't drag me around," he said grouchily and shook the other man off.

Roy withdrew, giving him an unsure look.  As much as Ed despised the man's usual smirk, it was even more disconcerting when that smirk was absent.  Ed fiddled with a button.

The colonel crossed his arms. "I thought you weren't going to break up with me," he said.

"I'm not, you're going to have to do it," Ed said defiantly.  He desperately tried to come up with all the things he'd wanted to say, anything to stop this from happening.

"Oh, I see, so you're avoiding me to make it more difficult for me," Roy figured.

Ed swallowed.  Why did it hurt to hear it put so bluntly?  "But now you've got me, so this is your chance.  Finish what you started, Colonel," he said flippantly, like he didn't care, like it was a dare.  He frantically wondered what he was doing.  He didn't want to break up!  What happened to begging?  He was doing it all wrong again!

"If I recall correctly, you're the one who started this," Mustang said, coming closer, "and what if I don't want to finish it?"

"You mean...?" Ed gulped.  

"I mean that I never had any intention of breaking up with you and I certainly was never trying to get you to break up with me," Roy said, more plainly than Roy Mustang ever said anything.  

The tight feeling in Ed's chest relaxed.  "Oh.  Good.  I don't want to break up, either," he said, somewhat clumsily.

Something flickered across Roy's face.  "Are you…sure?  You know you don't have to stay in this, Ed.  I know you hate some of the things that I do - a lot of the things I do.  I feel like you think I'm an asshole most of the time."

The hesitance in his voice sounded alarmingly unnatural.  "Don't ask me if I'm sure!" Ed sputtered, honestly a little offended.  "You don't have to tell me that!  And don't think so much of yourself that you believe you can actually intimidate me into doing anything, old man!"

Roy broke into a chuckle.

"You're not an asshole most of the time, but sometimes you do asshole things without thinking first.  Even so, I'm in this because… I like you," Ed huffed and crossed his arms.

Roy smiled and leaned closer.  "I like you, too," he said thickly, "even when you do asshole things without thinking first and pull crazy stunts that throw me completely off balance."  

Crazy stunts.  Hadn't those been Al's exact words, too?  The smile Roy wore made Ed's stomach flip-flop.

"Actually, I think I like you best when you're being unpredictable, wearing bad disguises, ruining entire towns, and generally making my life difficult," Mustang mused, fingering the collar of Ed's trench coat.

"Hey, this disguise isn't ba-" Ed began to defend himself but Roy's warm lips cut him off.  He forgot whatever he was going to say and threw himself into the kiss.  

Roy hummed and licked his lips when they finally parted.  "I wish you'd given me a chance to explain instead of avoiding me," he said.

"You wouldn't have needed a chance to explain if you hadn't blown me off," Ed countered.  "You can't act like I'm the kid and you're the adult, and I should just do what you say all the time."

Roy paused as Ed's words sunk in.  Ed was right, he hadn't intended to listen to anything Ed had to say on the matter of the auction.  Treating Ed like a kid and brushing him off had never worked out well in the past and only earned Roy resentment.  

"You have a point there," he conceded.  "Listen, I thought I would be able to assure you that it was no big deal.  I had no idea you'd get so mad."

"Why wouldn't I get mad?" Ed asked, brows drawing together.

Roy moved past him to lean on the wall.  "It's kind of cute that you got so mad, actually," he mused to himself with a smugness that got on Ed's nerves.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Ed asked dubiously.

Still smiling to himself, Roy lifted his hands to his mouth and breathed warm air on them.  

"Well, wouldn't you be mad if I did something like that?" Ed demanded when he didn't get a response to his question.

Black eyes cut over to him, considering.  "You're right, I wouldn't like it one bit," Roy admitted.

"That's right, and now you've already gone through with it," Ed complained with the wave of a hand.

"Ed, I'm not going to cheat on you," Roy insisted.  "Part of the deal is I kiss her at midnight, but everybody kisses everybody at midnight.  It's just a tradition, it doesn't have to mean anything."

"No tongue," Ed ordered.

"Of course not," Roy assured him.  He moved nearer to Ed, pinning him back against the wall.  He knew he should keep his distance because they were technically in public, but he couldn't help himself.  He hadn't had so much as a glimpse of Ed in three days.  He pressed Ed's shoulders back into the brick wall.  "That's just for you," he said and kissed Ed, giving him a long reminder of just what belonged to him.  It could have been the cold, but he thought he felt Ed shiver.

"That's right, and I'm not sharing," Ed reiterated when they parted.  He was no longer feeling the cold, his body felt hot.  

Roy kissed him again, stroking his face with cold fingertips and touching the strands of black hair that escaped Ed's hat.  "Turn it back," he murmured against Ed's lips.

"My hair?" Ed swallowed, barely able to concentrate as Roy kissed him.

Roy hummed near his ear.

Ed put his hands together silently and changed his hair back to blond as Roy continued to kiss him.  The kisses began to feel more intense, like the kind that might actually lead to something.  Roy felt Ed's thigh move between his legs.  Ed was really playing with fire here.  Roy would take him up against this brick wall in a heartbeat.  It was only too bad there were people waiting for him inside.  Roy forced himself to pull away.  "Ed, believe me, there is nothing I'd like more right now than to take you home, but I still have to go meet the winner of the auction," he said, pained.

"You haven't met her yet?" Ed asked.

"No, I came after you," Roy reminded him.

"Well, get in there!  You're being irresponsible!"

Roy shook his head and chuckled wryly.  He just wasn't going to win here.  "Listen, I'll make it up to you," he promised.

It was Ed's turn to trap Roy against the bricks, putting his palms on the wall on either side of his waist.  "Anything I want?" he asked, looking the man directly in the eye.

Roy was silent for a moment.  There was little change in his face at all, only a slight arching of dark brows.  "Anything you want," he finally said, words sounding casual and indifferent.  It was a very practiced tone.

Satisfied, Ed moved away, but Roy caught him for one more kiss before they parted for the night.  

The ball was the following day and Ed had two very important errands to run.  First thing in the morning, he went to Central Headquarters and purchased two tickets to the New Year's Eve Officer's Ball.  Tickets in his pocket, he paid a visit to the Hughes residence.  

"Edward!" Gracia exclaimed when she opened the door.  "What a wonderful surprise!  Please come in!"

He thanked her and let Alicia drag him over to the couch.  Gracia called for her husband and he came from the kitchen, coffee mug in hand.

"Lieutenant Colonel, I need a favor," Ed began as the man sat down.

"A regular favor or a top secret favor?" Hughes asked conspiratorially and leaned closer.

"Just a regular favor," Ed assured him.

"Go on," Hughes nodded and sipped his coffee.

"I decided to go to the ball last minute and… I don't know where to get a tuxedo," Ed admitted.

Hughes grinned.  "I'll take you to get one this morning!" he said excitedly.  "There are plenty of shops open, counting on last minute business!  It'll be no problem!"

"Oh, good," Ed said with relief.

"But I need a return favor," Hughes added.

"What?" Ed asked suspiciously.

"Baby-sit Alicia for us twice in January.  We'll pay you of course!"

"All right," Ed agreed, relieved.

"It's a deal, then!" Hughes declared.  "The shops should be opening up about now.  Just let me finish my coffee."

Gracia and Alicia opted to come along, too, for fashion advice, and the little family, Ed in tow, bundled up and walked to the boutiques on 8th Avenue.  They all helped select a few styles for Ed to try on and then Gracia and Alicia played in the main room while Hughes waited by the door of Ed's dressing room in case he needed anything.

"So that auction was interesting," Ed said as he removed his black jacket and shirt.

"You were there?  I didn't see you," Hughes replied.

Ed sensed a short joke coming on, so he quickly moved the topic along.  "So, Colonel Mustang does that every year?  I mean, geez, how arrogant is that guy?" Ed griped, kicking off his boots.  He knew it wasn't true, he knew Mustang's act when he saw it, but it was the best way he could think of to get information and keep up the act of not liking the Colonel.

"Roy?" Hughes chuckled.  "Well, he's pretty arrogant, but that's not why he does the auction.  He does it for charity."

"Charity, yeah, but auctioning himself off?  He must think he's pretty hot stuff," Ed snorted.  He stepped out of his pants and kicked them onto the chair with his toe.  "And the fact that people actually bid doesn't help his grossly inflated ego."

Hughes clearly found Ed's rancor amusing, but he did step up to defend his friend.  "To be fair, he was tricked into it the first time," the Lieutenant Colonel told him.

"Tricked into it?" Ed asked, pretending to be only casually interested as he put on the crisp, white button-down shirt.

"You see, our first year after graduating from Academy, he didn't have a date for the New Year's Eve Ball, so me and a couple other guys got someone to sneak his name onto the auction listing right before it went to the print shop.  He's been a hit ever since!" Hughes explained.

"He couldn't get a date?" Ed asked.

Hughes hummed in thought and then said, "It's not so much that he couldn't GET a date, it's that he didn't know who to ask.  Believe it or not, he was shy once.  Especially with women."

So it was true after all.  Roy's confession had seemed pretty earnest, but having confirmation from Hughes left no doubt in Ed's mind.  "Colonel Mustang?  SHY?" Ed pretended to be shocked all over again.

"Yup," Hughes chuckled, "even though there were plenty of women interested in him, even back then.  I told them to come to the auction for a surprise.  He sold pretty well his first year!  I mean, it was nothing like what he brings in now, but not too shabby!"

Ed glowered to himself as he finished dressing.  "Still, what a cocky thing to do."

"At least he isn't doing anything outrageous in the talent show, right?  At least we can be grateful for that!" Hughes chuckled.

"Talent show?" Ed asked snidely as he came out of the dressing room.  "All that bastard's good for is burning stuff, what kind of talent is that?"

Hughes seemed to find that hilarious.

"Um, how do I do this?" Ed asked, turning to face his older friend.

"Ah, the mystique of the bowtie," Hughes exclaimed before showing him how it was done.  

Ed watched and then untied it so he could do it himself.  "Perfect on the first try!" Hughes said proudly as he watched.  He then went about straightening the coat and collar and turned Ed to face the mirror, saying, "Voila!"

Both were silent a moment.  Ed was surprised by how grown-up he looked in the tuxedo.  He studied his reflection for a moment.

Hughes made a noise akin to a sniffle.  "It's like you're my son, going to his first dance!" he said in a way that made Ed think tears were going to stream down his face any moment.

"I'm far too old to be your son," he replied dryly.

"Still," Hughes said, mood unspoiled.

Ed looked up at him.  "If you want a son, why don't you have another kid? Maybe you'll get a boy," he suggested.

Hughes smiled and looked over to where his wife and daughter were still coloring with the crayons they'd brought.  "I think this coming year is the year for that," he said, voice hushed.

Before Hughes could begin a long-winded speech about the beauty and perfection of Gracia and Alicia, Ed called them over to get their opinions.  Gracia all but took over and sent him back into the changing room several times with different coats and shirts.  With the help of the Hughes family, two female store clerks, and the shop owner, Ed finally selected a tuxedo.

+

"Wow, nii-san, you look amazing!" Al exclaimed when Ed changed into his tuxedo that evening.

"Pretty good, huh?" Ed grinned.  He had completed the outfit with new shoes and cuff links, and slicked his hair back into a low ponytail.

"You really look your age, it looks great," Al said approvingly.

"I got a surprise for you at the boutique," Ed said, grin growing.  It had been tough to keep this secret all afternoon.

"Something for me?" Al asked.

"Formal wear for my little brother!" Ed announced, procuring a dashing red bowtie and matching cummerbund from a bag under his bed.

"Those are for me?" Al asked excitedly.  "Are they going to fit?"

"I got the biggest they had.  Here, I'll put them on you," Ed offered.  He expertly fastened the cummerbund around Al's waist and tied the bowtie around his neck.  

The two brothers stood next to one another, crowding to get a look in the same mirror.  "Man, you're gonna show me up!" Ed laughed.

"I feel like I'm going to fit in, now," Al said, "thanks, nii-san."  Ed wished he didn't have to just imagine the smile on his brother's face right now.